My acceptance is my forgiveness

My acceptance is my forgiveness

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Would I rather be right or happy? I can go into the complete injustice of it all. Yell and scream, cry and be sad but in the end I wouldn’t be in a different place just maybe have a few more battle wounds. I sadly have come to the realization that I need to say goodbye to people I care about. I had this whole blog post written but forgot to hit save and ended up losing everything I wrote. Now I don’t even want to write what I wrote about. The decision to say goodbye to these people didn’t come from anger it came from an understanding of their family and loyalty and love. They did what they should do for each other. My issue is,without any ill intention on their part, the trigger they set off inside me turns my love to something else. Again it’s neither their fault nor their problem but I go from a calm state of acceptance to a state of frustration and anger. I work very hard to be in that calm loving state and as much as I care for these people they trigger my chaos. I don’t want anymore chaos. I want peace. I choose peace. Even reading this post I hear the anxiety attached to it. I’ve learned so much in my daily practice. I didn’t just jump to this decision as I’ve done so in the past. I waited and meditated. I listened to my inner guidance for support. This is about me and what I need now in my life and chaos isn’t it. I wish from the very bottom of my soul these people all the best including the one who is getting married. I pray they receive all the things I want for myself. I accept them for who they are especially the one mentioned above. I wish them all the love the world has to offer. I will think of them often they are good people.  This will be as it should be my final post on this subject. My acceptance is my forgiveness. Amen

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